Welcome to Dead Tired Coffee Company. By using our site, you’re agreeing to the following:

• Products: Our coffee is roasted to order, shipped fresh, and strong enough to wake the dead. Results may vary.
• Orders: Once you place an order, you agree to pay for it. We agree to roast, pack, and ship it—fast.
• Subscriptions (Eternal Cup Club): If you sign up, you’ll get coffee delivered automatically until you cancel. Cancel anytime—no ouija board required.
• Behavior: Don’t misuse our site. Don’t try to hack us, copy our content, or summon spirits with our checkout button.
• Liability: We’re not responsible for any supernatural awakenings, jitters, or productivity boosts caused by our coffee.

☕ In short: Treat us fair, we’ll treat you fair, and everyone stays caffeinated.